Thoughts and ramblings....

Hiya, long time no see! I have been busy with work and training, no adventures, no having fun, just lots of work.

Today my Boxercise class was cancelled because of the Marldon Apple Pie Fair, so I took the opportunity to have a day off!
I was planning an epic weekend in N. Devon, but the end of this week I had a very bad stomach bug and haven't been able to eat for 2 days.

I decided that still I had to get out of Totnes, it gets stagnant staying in the same area all the time, I needed a road trip, had to be affordable though, so I thought I would check out the coast where I want to do another 103 miler.

I have to say that to check out a new route as I did with the South Devon 103 will take more time and money than I can do next year, so looks like 2015 for the North Devon 103. Makes sense, glad in a way I did leave Totters today to find that out.

I left with 'the boys' them being Paddy, Murphy and Finnegan, my beautiful dogs and the most rewarding, respectful, funny, fun, energetic friends I could have. I have learnt today that, yes, they are 'just' dogs, but they are what keep me going, if they were not here I'm not sure what would happen to me!

I drove over Dartmoor, pleasure in itself, makes you feel the beauty of the world, how demanding, yet isolated things are, it's epic hills and views, even on a cloudy day like today.
I passed through Tavistock, which brings back many happy memories for me, then onto Launceston and on to Bude.

Today is my Mum and Dad's wedding anniversary, we used to go to Bude on holiday when I was little, complete fluke, Mum text me when I arrived there.
We had some great holidays, I always remember Dad carrying me over the seaweed! haha

I found the SW Coast Path and off we went!

A little lead walking for all 3, then the 2 spaniels were off! I think Paddy is finally getting used to being on the lead now, although it took him to 5 miles out of 6 to stop pulling!

We walked along the coast, quite easy coast I thought, but we only did 3 miles to Widemouth Bay, as Paddy shouldn't do much more than that, we had some water from the ice cream van and headed on back another 3 miles to Bude.

The views were beautiful and to hear the sound of the sea next to me again brought back happy memories.

Someone this week asked me if I was happy.
I thought about it, then realised that I am not, I was thinking about this as I walked the beautiful Devon Coast with my lovely dogs, but yet, there is something missing.

I think, that I worry all the time about money, every day, every waking moment, therefore I can never relax, chill out, enjoy life, because I feel that I cannot afford life.
I am better than this time last year, but I have debt, I need to change my mortgage, and I have no social life because of my financial situation.

I have thought momentarily it's because I am on my own, but no, I have the male company I need,  I have my boys at home and I'm too busy for anything else, it is just that I am constantly concerned about how I can pay for things.
I'm glad really that it's that simple, but in a month or so it will be 2 year anniversary and I shall be increasing my prices as I have proved my worth!

So, that was what I was thinking on my day off, in a most beautiful part of the countryside, depressing isn't it?

All 3 of my chaps were amazing though today, we got back to Bude, walked up to the cafe bit and I had an ice cream, the only type I eat, a Mr Whippy! All 4 of us shared it, it's the first thing I've eaten properly and so far so good! Pea, ham and mint risotto for dinner tonight, but it was lovely today.
We drove back the same way we came, enjoyed the Dartmoor experience, stopped off at Badgers Holt so the boys could get a quick swim before home and then we were back.

I am completely shattered now, but better for getting away, with the most honest, lovely males in the world, my boys, Paddy, Murphy and Finnegan.
They are all asleep in the basket together, I'm not long for bed.

I will try and be more cheery, I promise!

You have to take the rough with the smooth eh?