So, last night, I popped back to see if Paddy was ok with the fireworks at midnight as I usually do, but this year, instead of going back out to celebrate into the wee hours, I fell asleep on the sofa and woke up at 5am! Rock n' roll eh?
But, that meant the very best thing - a New Year's Day run, without a hangover!
It's been a while since I've run just for me as I've been ill for 3 weeks, so today I felt well enough and enthusiastic enough to go out there and knock out a few k's.
Decent brekkie of oatbran porridge and fruit donned my favourite lycra trail kit and hit the river path.
Today the weather was beautiful, the sun was shining, and an overall positive feeling in the air. There were loads of people out walking with their families and dogs, I managed to keep cool and calm my run rage as there were no incidents of getting tripped up by dogs or kids or anything!
Today I was running to think, as usual!
But today I was thinking about the past year, I guess a lot of people do that on 1st Jan eh? I thought about the last New Years Day, which was not productive! I thought about the highlights of my 2012, and as I ran I recalled my most memorable, fantastic moment of 2012, the best time of my life - The Forces March!
Nothing could ever beat your first Forces March I reckon, because of that experience I made so of the most positive, supportive awesome friends anyone could ever have. It's a massive family of kindness, so it was no surprise that I volunteered to co-ordinate fundraising in Devon for The Veterans Charity.
With the Forces March I met my 'Funky' partner in crime, Mr Rob Starbuck. We've only known each other since April 2012, but I know that I have one of the bestest friends ever! There's no pretence, no judgement, just fitness, music and dance! So, for that very friendship I would thank the whole year for.
As I kept running, I felt more and more hip pain. It's something I'm getting sorted, but has been getting worse, but I was in Forest Gump mode today, enjoying the fresh air, scenery, living!
Part of my route took me down Longmarsh as I wanted the view in the sunshine, there were loads and loads of puddles down there, and lots of people in smart clothes and clean wellies - well....... I had to didn't I? I legged it down there straight through the middle of every puddle, splashing as much as I could! I know, I know, karma and all that, but muddy is fun, and these people looked like they needed proper real fun in their lives! Not material pleasures, but muddy puddle pleasures! So I carried on down, giggling all the way and turned back up. The party of people dispersed magnificently for me to pass with ease on the way back, still giggling!
My hip was getting worse and I was also feeling a pain in my glute on the same side, probably related! But still no stopping me, I was on a mission, my lungs felt better, but not back to form, I found the inclines hard work on the breathing today, which is unusual.
Again, I thought about the past year, the triathlon, how bad I am at swimming, that will change this year, it will have to, at least by September anyway when I tackle Dawlish again. Good news is I'm on the verge of getting a road bike so at least I can improve easier on that!
I also thought about the few times in the year where I wasn't so mentally positive as usual. Those moments were all fuelled by times when I was pressured into thinking that single wasn't normal! I have lovely friends and most of them in great relationships, or relationships and from the outside they look ok! And even for my Mum's sake, she doesn't like me being alone. I guess everyone thinks that it's the norm to have a partner, to share life with someone, but I have since found out this year, that I am not that good at relationships, but significantly awesome at one night stands and the like! haha
But on a serious note, I don't want that pressure anymore, I'm on the fitness singles website, I have lots of male friends, but I just don't know what I want.
I don't know myself, I was thinking this as I ran up Dartington Drive, I looked down at the flowing river, and thought that actually I don't know my flow. I don't like myself I know that, I think until I am actually happy and content with my own life and character then how can I be happy being part of a relationship?
I'm going to get into my own flow this year and try to like myself a little better, but for that I would need to perfect, and that is just not going to happen.........
At the top of the Drive I thought my lungs would burst, mucus in there making my breathing so hard I thought I was going to throw up, but then a 'Rita' moment kicked in and off I went down hill running like a small child without a care in the world, arms flailing, feet pounding, biggest smile ever.
I'd ditched the negative relationship thoughts by then as they weren't conducive to a nice run, and thought about my Christmas with my Mum, my successes at work, how well everyone had trained, how great my clients were looking and how fit they had become, how Fighting Fit Devon had turned a corner and this coming year is going to be so so good. More smiles, more pace, more hip pain, but I was flying.
Never look back, never go back to anything negative, but whatever makes you feel good, do it again, like running, like The Forces March, like the good solid trustworthy friends that will always be there.
2013 is going to be a great year, negative people and thoughts are going, I have no time now for them, just for the future.
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